Booze hag

I am actually an alcoholic.

How proud my dead grandma would be of me that I am following in her footsteps.

I am actually fucking my life up becuase of how much and how often I am drinking. Wank. But the really dumb thing is that I don't care that much - I'm having too much fun destroying everything I've worked towards achieving. Yuss.

Also, went to a nudie bar last night which was hilarious. Especially as we chased it with a solid session of kareoke at vivace straight afterwards. Awesome.

Tonight was Gorgeous Will's 21st birthday party at metro - was pretty rad as they'd invited a fuckload of musicians who all jammed together... a whole heap of african drumming kids, more or less all of the vibrasics, and all the retrophonicfunkmachine dudes. It was amazing.

I came to the really dumb realisation that I was incredibly enamoured with one of my friends though. Which is sucky as he not only has an out-of-town girlfriend and possibly has a little something something going on with one of my casual friends...but he flirts with me OUTRAGEOUSLY (say it in a french accent, sounds better) and is ridiculously cute and funny and has awesome shaggy hair and ZRAH! Poos. he's taken and it's silly to even be moping about it.

I'll be in Auckland in a week.

My life is running away with me. I always take on too much stuff for me to actually be able to deal with. Like capping show, which is awesome, but all-consuming.

My flatmate scares me shitless.

I came home really late one night to pick up a bottle of wine with Wal and Moana came home and glowered at Wal before storming into the bathroom. We were about to leave when I heard the bathroom door open and close a multitude of times in quick succession - went to check it out and Moana was sitting on the washing machine, opening and closing the door, staring at me really intensely. I asked him "hey man, what the fuck are you doing?" and he didn't even reply - just kept openign and closing the door, staring at me reallly intently and creepily. So I laughed and said "ooooo-k, I'm going to go now" and left.

Came home at 5am and went to bed - woke up mid-afternoon and found a note shoved under my door in really scrawled, childish letters saying

"i hate you luci, luv moana"

FUCKING CUNT.

He left a not on my door the night after saying "hey luci, I'm really sorry about the note. I was really drunk, I promise it'll never happen again" BUT WHATEVS! If you write someone a note like that, even if you're really boozed, it shows you have some serious problems - and not just with the person that the note is being written for.

So I'm thinking of moving out. Maybe. Dad has said that I am more than welcome to move home while I flathunt but I'm just concerned that if I move out, it's sending Moana the message that he's won - that what he did was ultimately a good thing because he'd be getting what he wanted. That asshole should be the one to move out.

Du-m-b. Now it's 5am and I need to walk home.